


The Husk Known As Jane Crocker

by dead_stardust



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, Cheating, Earth C (Homestuck), F/M, Hurt No Comfort, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jane Crocker Deserves Better, M/M, Post-Canon, Speculation, The Homestuck Epilogues, fuck the homestuck epilogues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-24
Updated: 2019-11-24
Packaged: 2021-02-17 21:27:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21550114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dead_stardust/pseuds/dead_stardust
Summary: Ever since Crockertier, Jane Crocker hasn't been in control of her own body.
Relationships: Jake English/Dirk Strider, Jane Crocker/Gamzee Makara, Jane Crocker/Jake English
Comments: 3
Kudos: 30
Collections: Jane Crocker Love Hours





	The Husk Known As Jane Crocker

**Author's Note:**

> The Homestuck Epilogues suck and they absolutely murdered best girl.
> 
> I wrote this after sentimentalPackrat told me that Homestuck^2 updated and Jane and Jake are in it and my soul immediately left my body because I just KNOW they're further ruining my girl Janey. :(

This wasn’t her. This wasn’t Jane at all! She wouldn’t do that, would she? She didn’t hate trolls. She didn’t hate _anyone…!_

Jane stood next to her husband, in the robotic suit of her body controlled by the essence of The Condesce through Crockercorp. She had no free will. Instead, her mind was chained inside of her body. She could not control her actions. Her negative emotions, however, burst through.

She was an unwilling participant in her own life as she gazed at Jake, the love of her life, her darling husband… Who still had feelings for his old lover from a decade prior.

Did he ever love her? She wasn’t sure.

Did he ever like her as a _friend?_ Her heart ached as the sinking feeling of it being a possibility set in.

Did Dirk or Roxy ever like her as a friend? Was she just… another player in the game?

She wasn’t a friend to them. She had never been considered a friend, was she?

If she was, they would know that her behavior since entering Earth C was not her.

As her body spoke to Jake, her mind screamed, begging him for help. She wanted nothing else but to be a participant in life, yet she was stuck in the role of an unwilling observer. In times like these, she would confide in Roxy, but how could she do that if she had no control over her actions?

How long had it been since she had free reign of herself?

* * *

“Are you still awake?” Jake asked. It was nearing midnight. Jane’s body was quite punctual when it came to her sleeping schedule. When she had been in control, she wasn’t the best at getting to sleep on time, but she always got her eight hours. Her mind was awake as she heard Jake.

After a brief pause, Jane felt the bed shift as Jake got up. He shuffled around the room, opened their bedroom door, and left.

She waited for his return. Perhaps he was going to the bathroom, or getting a glass of water. He would be back.

She knew he wouldn’t return until right before she was to awaken. It had been a pattern ever since they started a life together. Well, he and the body that stole her identity.

As the morning birds chirped outside of their window, Jane heard the door open. Quiet walking lead to Jake settling beside Jane. As she breathed in, she smelled pungent sweat mixed in with familiar body spray. Dirk’s favorite body spray, in fact. Jake was covered in his aroma, as he was every night.

He was cheating on her, or was he? The body that Jake knew as Jane Crocker was not her, but someone else. Jake English was not married to the true Jane Crocker. He was married to a corrupt husk.

Her voice ached as she tried calling out for him once more, but her words were only the sounds in her own mind. Her eyes opened to see her “husband” curled up close to her. His tanned cheeks dusted with freckles, framed with his square-rimmed glasses. Was she some kind of idiot to him? Pretending to be asleep while wearing his glasses. What an asshole.

Not that it mattered. She couldn’t call him out on his behavior. She couldn’t object to him trying to make a happier life for himself. He deserved to find his own happiness if she wouldn’t provide for him. Not that she had the ability to provide the happiness he deserved. Not that she had the ability to seek out her own happiness.

She theorized that her body reacted to her mind’s craving for affection, love, and companionship, and that’s why it sought out the company of Gamzee Makara. Jane didn’t care much for Gamzee, but her body brought her to him. He didn’t love her. If he even held amorous feelings, it was held for the automatic processes of her body. She didn’t feel loved by him. She felt hurt and abused as her body forced her through the actions of cheating on Jake.

And her son… Her darling son, whom she had no involvement in creating, naming, or raising. He would never know the real her.

Whenever she thought of Tavros Crocker, Jane’s throat would close up. She wasn’t ready to be a mother just yet, however her husk forced parenthood upon her. Not that she could do anything in regards to raising Tavros. She didn’t have to lift a finger. Yet she vividly remembered his birth. She had to be cut open for him to be brought into the world. No amount of anesthesia could hinder her mind from witnessing it. Whenever she was left alone with her thoughts, such as during dreamless nights where sleep could not claim her, the memory would pass through her mind. She felt the pain of her skin being cut open, her organs shifted around, her son’s first cries of life and her inability to hold him and cry to Jake about how wonderful a moment it should’ve been.

The way her husk treated her son disgusted her. She wanted to throw up as she watched her own hand be raised in the threat of a slap to his cheek to discipline a boy who had done nothing to wrong her. Even if he did, she would instead prefer to sit him down and teach him why he shouldn’t do whatever behavior he did.

As Tavros ventured into teenagehood, he distanced himself further and further from his parents. Jane knew nothing about her son, as her husk didn’t care about his interests, his life, his friends, anything that made him _him._ Her husk was indifferent to his life.

And the citizens she so dutifully guided as role of President, hating her for the laws her husk set in place. She would never _dream_ to enact them. She wanted to have a fair and equal world for all, not this hellscape of hatred and strife.

Those she once called friends and family now loathed her. Some avoided her entirely, some pretended to stay on her good side. She could see right through them. Jane wanted to call out for help, wanting to beg them to find a way to free her from the prison she was in, but that was years ago.

Jane Crocker resigned herself to her fate as a guest in her own life.


End file.
